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Tengen Toppa Banjo-Kazooie: All the Lights in the Sky are Jiggies
A week or two ago, I downloaded the Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts and Bolts demo on a whim. I had quite a lot of fun, and my first impression was "It's as if they applied gravity to Kingdom Hearts 2's gummi ship building and gave us more of those novelty crazy parts!" I assure you, this is a good thing. I still wasn't convinced wether or not to get it, though. Until I saw this.
Disclaimer: I think that thing is, sadly, more like a "statue" of a giant robot than a real one. I also believe it's in the process of falling over.
Yeah. The rest is history. I'm about two-thirds of the way through the game (50 jiggies for the 75 required for the presumed final area, although there are 131 in the game in total, in typical Rare collect-'em-all fashion) and it's been a pretty awesome ride so far. Land vehicles sometimes behave a little weird in uneven terrain and sometimes the physics engine just seems to hate you, but, well, it's like the video game equivalent of a crate full of legos in which a Banjo-Kazooie cartridge was accidentally dumped. I can't NOT like this.
Though, playing the game made me think. What if they had done this for the Wii instead?
If Nintendo had come up with it in the recent years, it would probably be called "Wii Build" or something. The game would be much more minimalistic, with Miis driving the crazy contraptions and no real story to speak of. There would be no hub and worlds to explore, only expanded versions of the test track in pristine white, and the challenges would be chosen from menus. For every challenge you win, you'd earn a gold star. Heck, if you fail the challenge, you'd earn a silver star anyway, because in Wii Build, everyone always wins! Not that the stars do anything, because all challenges and parts would be unlocked from the start and you could view the credits from the main menu. Chill out. You're only here to have fun. Smile. You could trade blueprints and race your friends, but only if you enter a 25-digit friendcode along with the ones already on your machine. You could also play with random strangers, but in those modes, you could only use vehicles premade by Nintendo. Sorry! We can't allow you to traumatize a kid with a flying car shaped like a dong, please understand. Driving and building could, naturally, only be done with the Wii Wheel and Wii Build Happiness Thing, respectively.
Prior to its unveiling, Reggie Fils-Aime would tell the press "This year at E3, we'll have announcements that will make not only casual players, but also core gamers shit a ton of bricks." Then, once the big day comes, after the only notable announcements were an expansion set to Animal Crossing and a Nintendo DS port of Gears of War, Cammie Dunaway and Shigeru Miyamoto would come on stage while Thus Spracht Zathusra plays. Reggie would tell a heartwarming story about how, as a kid, he's always wanted to drive a firetruck because his father was a fireman. Then, he would say "Today, my dream is about to COME TRUE!" Reggie, Cammie and Shigeru would then proceed to race each other with, respectively, a cement mixer, old-style biplane and fire truck. (Yes, there was a goof-up backstage with who was meant to be handed which wiimote but they sort of play along with it anyway.) Each contestant would veer off-course in a different way, but would keep on smiling as they play, waggling their bodies exageratedly with the wiimotes while the audience keeps dead silent and people streaming the press conference become glad there's no one to see them cry.
It still would be WAY better than Wii Music, though.
So yeah, if anyone has the game (or is thinking of getting it), LET'S TRADE BLUEPRINTS. I have things like the Air Pimp, Facepuncher Mk. II, Greg Killmaster and Ball.
Disclaimer: I think that thing is, sadly, more like a "statue" of a giant robot than a real one. I also believe it's in the process of falling over.
Yeah. The rest is history. I'm about two-thirds of the way through the game (50 jiggies for the 75 required for the presumed final area, although there are 131 in the game in total, in typical Rare collect-'em-all fashion) and it's been a pretty awesome ride so far. Land vehicles sometimes behave a little weird in uneven terrain and sometimes the physics engine just seems to hate you, but, well, it's like the video game equivalent of a crate full of legos in which a Banjo-Kazooie cartridge was accidentally dumped. I can't NOT like this.
Though, playing the game made me think. What if they had done this for the Wii instead?
If Nintendo had come up with it in the recent years, it would probably be called "Wii Build" or something. The game would be much more minimalistic, with Miis driving the crazy contraptions and no real story to speak of. There would be no hub and worlds to explore, only expanded versions of the test track in pristine white, and the challenges would be chosen from menus. For every challenge you win, you'd earn a gold star. Heck, if you fail the challenge, you'd earn a silver star anyway, because in Wii Build, everyone always wins! Not that the stars do anything, because all challenges and parts would be unlocked from the start and you could view the credits from the main menu. Chill out. You're only here to have fun. Smile. You could trade blueprints and race your friends, but only if you enter a 25-digit friendcode along with the ones already on your machine. You could also play with random strangers, but in those modes, you could only use vehicles premade by Nintendo. Sorry! We can't allow you to traumatize a kid with a flying car shaped like a dong, please understand. Driving and building could, naturally, only be done with the Wii Wheel and Wii Build Happiness Thing, respectively.
Prior to its unveiling, Reggie Fils-Aime would tell the press "This year at E3, we'll have announcements that will make not only casual players, but also core gamers shit a ton of bricks." Then, once the big day comes, after the only notable announcements were an expansion set to Animal Crossing and a Nintendo DS port of Gears of War, Cammie Dunaway and Shigeru Miyamoto would come on stage while Thus Spracht Zathusra plays. Reggie would tell a heartwarming story about how, as a kid, he's always wanted to drive a firetruck because his father was a fireman. Then, he would say "Today, my dream is about to COME TRUE!" Reggie, Cammie and Shigeru would then proceed to race each other with, respectively, a cement mixer, old-style biplane and fire truck. (Yes, there was a goof-up backstage with who was meant to be handed which wiimote but they sort of play along with it anyway.) Each contestant would veer off-course in a different way, but would keep on smiling as they play, waggling their bodies exageratedly with the wiimotes while the audience keeps dead silent and people streaming the press conference become glad there's no one to see them cry.
It still would be WAY better than Wii Music, though.
So yeah, if anyone has the game (or is thinking of getting it), LET'S TRADE BLUEPRINTS. I have things like the Air Pimp, Facepuncher Mk. II, Greg Killmaster and Ball.
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